A great transformation in my life began when I heard a whisper from within that cut through the noise of my own victim stories:
"My relationship pain has something to do with my relationship with myself."
I didn't know how yet. But I knew it, in a deep, pre-verbal way.
Nine months of studying the deep psychology of intimate relationships later. Nine months of coaching training later. A year- and counting- of deep evolution with mentor coaches later.
I now know that creating the relationship I want springs from rediscovering my true identity as the powerful creator of my reality.
And this part blew my mind-
when I released my dependency on the other person to always be a certain way for me to have the experience I wanted, I found the power to have what I want that I was missing all my life.
I am an utterly different being in my relationships now- much more empowered, creative and much more fulfilled. And that feels truly AMAZING!
You have this power.
And, ladies, it's P*ssytwinkle.
It's your beliefs about yourself that are preventing you from having it.
Your belief in the identity you adopted when you learned that you had to be someone other than who you are to be cared for.
Your belief that you had to disconnect from your needs and desires to be loved.
Your belief in your identity as powerless to create what you want.
But your true, Source-given identity is The Creator.
And The Creator’s fuel is your Love-
what you love, desire, want to experience and create.
Loving yourself enough to know you are worthy of it.
Love is your creative superpower.
It stands for what inspires you, gives you pleasure, connects you to your purpose.
It won’t let you tolerate from others what isn’t for your highest good.
It won’t let you tolerate the obstacles, beliefs and shadows that you throw in your own way that aren’t for your highest good.
It will daylight your co-dependency on needing other people to be a certain way for you to have the experience you want.
It will disempower, compassionately, your powerless victim identity.
It might feel good to believe that the responsibility for your happiness rests on others.
Dumping the fantasy that other people will take care of your needs and give you the love you need in the exact way you need it all the time ifeels like the death of a beautiful dream.
The dream of the Child who needed that from her caregivers- caregivers who didn’t always deliver.
Hey, I get it. I felt a mighty resistance to letting it go, too.
But that Child’s sweet dream is an obstacle to you getting what you want now.
Trade that dream for your sovereignty, your authorship and the power of your loved-fueled Creator to create the relationship you want.
Because all your relationships are between YOU AND YOU, that power is yours.
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