I just finished a two month painting jam to prepare for the group show this weekend.
I didn't paint much at all last year. So instead of having a ready body of work to show, I had to get busy and make some.
Pressure. Ugh.
And that presented me with the choice between two entirely different experiences:
Ego: Performing for others. Comparing myself to others. Living outside of myself. Anxiety, fear, needing certainty. Not trusting myself or life.
Or Eros: An upward surge of the life force from pelvis and belly onto my heart. Unifying body and spirit. Unlimited. Living outward as a Unique Self, in wholeness with myself, my zest, passion and desire, my creativity and turn-on. Trusting LIFE.
If that sounds HOT, it is.
My abstract painting practice is a brilliant life coach.
It shows me that state of my relationship with myself.
And the state of my relationship with myself is always mirroring back to me the state of my relationship with my life, art and others-whether I am reacting out of fear, or acting from the pleasure of creating what I want to experience in my relationship with my life, art and others.
I got back into painting cautiously at first, trying to control and "figure it out." (Caution and creativity are not friends.)
All up in my Ego.
Gradually my body remembered how much it loves color, line, to flow with body and brush to music.
Back to my Eros.
And what I created surprised me, because I surrendered to the pleasure of every second and stopped planning how it would turn out.
Eros creates my best and most favorite art. My best work. My best days. My best relationships. My best life.
Why?
Because Eros opens us up to the penetration of life.
To love life as it is and love ourselves as we are.
Eros is the absence of fear and the abundance of joy.
Eros creates with our desire.
Eros is the body and soul experience of our own uniqueness and beauty.
Feeling ourselves in our experience moment by moment by moment.
Your Eros is OF YOU and FOR YOU.
And it's vibration inspires the world around you.
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