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Writer's pictureLinda Wallace

The Masculine is not toxic- but it can be triggering to the Feminine.


Men are bigger and stronger than women.


And, as Alison Armstrong, author of the Queen's Code maintains, even the healthy expression of the nature of the Masculine can trigger the "Cave Woman", who is still embedded in our Feminine nervous system.


The Cave Woman who is constantly and subconsciously scanning his facial expression, his body language, his tone of voice for threat.


So when the Masculine presents itself as emotionally insensitive and mis-attuned, un-collaborative, inflexible, controlling, hierarchical, and judgmental, her threat alarms go off.


“Will he listen my concerns? Will he care about my needs and desires? WILL THIS TIGER PROTECT ME, OR WILL HE EAT ME?”


This scanning for threat is so subconscious that we aren’t aware we are doing it.


Because, for many of us- me included-worrying about whether we can trust the Masculine has been just part of being a woman.


And many of us, me included, have experienced many reasons why we shouldn't trust the Masculine.


Armstrong, in the Queen’s Code, goes deeply into the brilliant nature of the healthy Masculine- and why it can naturally trigger the Feminine.


Because the Masculine was put on earth to do a different job than the Feminine.

A job that requires a capacity to detach emotionally in order to protect by putting his life and limb at risk.

To take charge or take orders with no ambiguity to protect and provide for the tribe.

To logically and unemotionally judge and discard, without sentiment, what does not produce the most beneficial and effective outcome, efficiently.


This is not how the nature of the Feminine, who prefers collaboration, listening and attuning, and making room for emotional expression, does things. And it can even make her feel unsafe.


Because as Armstrong says, “Men are not big hairy women”.


HOW WE, AS WOMEN, FEEL ABOUT THE NATURE OF THE MASCULINE HAS A HUGE EFFECT ON THE QUALITY OF OUR LIVES.


Whether we can trust the Masculine to help us so we can stop over-functioning and doing it all by ourselves.


Whether we can stay open to receiving the provision of the Masculine- even when it comes to us in ways that aren’t natural to us or in our preference.


Whether we recognize and choose a Masculine a partner who is solid in his healthy masculine nature- neither a push-over nor a bully- allowing us to relax into our Feminine nature, even when he sometimes triggers us with his Masculine nature.


AND THIS PIECE IS SOOOO IMPORTANT:

Whether or not we are able to erect the power of our own Masculine energy within ourselves depends on how we feel about the Masculine.


Because I was so allergic to the Masculine, I was reluctant to adopt any of the qualities of the Masculine within myself at all.


I refused to embody any Masculine energy within me because of the hurt that the Masculine inflicted on me and the women of my lineage.


And in rejecting any expression of Masculine within me, I disconnected myself from a vital source of my creational power.


I left myself with no inner Masculine Champion to speak for and protect the Feminine in me- the right to my feelings, my needs, desires and my spirit.


When I learned to heal my relationship with the Masculine, I began to create a beautiful, co-creational marriage between the Feminine Muse and the Masculine Champion WITHIN ME.


This is P*ssytwinkle, ladies.


Because we can P*ssytwinkle in the potential of our Feminine creativity all day long, but it needs to be cherished, given a voice and shown the way to make what she desires real in the world.


And that is what the power of the co-creative love affair between your Feminine Muse and your Masculine Champion within does.

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